Sia’s ‘Elastic Heart’: Why you guys are perverts

Sunday Afternoon Shower-Reflection (SASR) is a technical term for the time we spend contemplating our shitty lives in the shower. More often that not we’re hungover, and so we don’t care that we’re accelerating our already massive electricity bill just to stand motionless, naked and (mostly) alone, like a spare prick under a fountain of shame. We find this activity soothing, and definitely more fun than eating the rest of the cold Dominoes in the kitchen that was already making us feel a bit sick. During this half meditative half depressed state, it’s easy for our minds to drift to off to places we don’t want to go. We worry about work, about money, about relationships, about drinking a shot out of our cousin’s bellybutton the night before and realizing that was so wrong in so many ways.

When we think of some of the worst things imaginable committed by humanity we think of murder, rape, pedophilia, war. We feel grateful for the things we have but also guilty for the things we aren’t doing that could help others. We might listen to some music and howl along half-heartedly. My favourite song at the moment is Sia’s ‘Elastic Heart’. Sometimes I like to pretend that I’m the little feral dancing kid in her videos, until I get scared about how exhilarating it feels to hiss at the postman. This is why the recent controversy surrounding this new video has come to my attention. People are saying things like ‘woah Sia, you’re pure like, lovin’ the paedos aye’. Being a creative person myself and loving all things pretentious and arty, this kind of ignorance astounds me. Amoungst other things this video is expressive, beautiful, at times harrowing and for me exemplifies the most acute pains we experience as mere humans, such as mental illness. Both Shia and Maddie’s performances are exquisite. Through contemporary dance they portray human struggles. With reference to the allegations of those offended by the video claiming that it promotes or trivializes paedophilia, there is no inappropriate sexual touching between the performers, what they are conveying is symbolic and poignant, they are dancing – it is art. Why does everything nowadays have to be so aggressively and sexually perverse for us to pay attention to it? Just so people can have someone else to blame for the projection of their own sick thoughts?

Recently, I have been reading Lena Dunham’s new book ‘Not that kind of Girl’ and, similarly to the controversy surrounding Sia’s ‘Elastic Heart’ video, some people made claims that she sexually assaulted her sister in a chapter where she talks about being fascinated with her vagina and as a small child curiously looks at her sister’s, probably to reassure herself that hers is normal and nothing sadistic is going to crawl out and maul her in her sleep. To me, it’s interesting that these accusations are coming from men – clearly there is some kind of agenda behind them. Perhaps they read it and became aroused and thus horrified at said arousal and blamed Lena for sharing her innocent child-like experience with the world because it made them feel that way and wanted to shout ‘Lena’s a massive perv! She wants to finger blast her sister!’ just to cover up their own perverted inclinations.

I would love to live in a world where art could be appreciated for what it is, where people were open-minded and less ignorant about things they don’t yet understand. It is unfair that Sia was made to apologise for the video, one should never have to apologise for talent and for art…unless of course your art consists of porking a minor then that’s just not cool. So next time you’re in the shower and find yourself reflecting on the problems in the world, remember what Scroobius Pip said: ‘Thou shalt not think any male over the age of 30 that plays with a child that is not their own is a paedophile. Some people are just nice.’